” I start taking deep breathes again until I calm down enough to listen.“That’s good, now let me tell you the important things. You’re John Do... an 18 year old high school student. You were a bit of a loner but had one close friend though that did not help with how poorly your high school life has been. You died on your walk home from school. As you walked along the side of the road a car lost control and ran right into you.” The orb explains a bit more about myself but mostly small stuff to. Then she exposed that she did everything beside sexual intercourse with her boyfriends. I told her that if you didn’t enjoyed sex then you wasted your and your BF time. I asked her that your BF didn’t ever ask you for sex. She said they did but I used to satisfy them by giving blowjob or handjob. By now she had started chatting with me openly. According to what she said, she gave her first blowjob at the age of 16yr to her first BF. I asked her several time but she always denied to have sex. I hated my life. I hated my body and I despised how the men around the school looked at me. Guys hit on me all the time, making sexual innuendos and it made them sick. I desired the intimate touch of sex but I didn't feel worthy of feeling it. My attachment to Mark affected me more than I had realized. He had been the first guy since Ben, that I had lowered my guard with. Yet, my selfishness had driven him away. The signals were all there. He loved me, but I was too hard headed to love him. ’ ‘Yeah, ’tis,’ he replied, ‘Shoulda never brung yer out here. Goddammed cold place. Be snowin’ afore ya know it.’ He sampled the soup, pulling a face as he tasted the foul meat and weeds that was all they had for food. ‘Best ya go ter town ter get yerself a job. Leastways yer’ll have sumpin’ to eat then.’ ‘Are you sending me away?’ asked Caroline, looking aghast at him. ‘I could never leave you here like this.’ ‘Well, if’n yer don’t, then we’ll both die here. Best yer save yerself. Yer young.
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